We had these next door neighbors growing up that had HBO. This may not seem shocking, except that is was the early 80’s. They had a huge antenna on top of OUR roof, just so they could get the signal. They recorded every single movie and had a huge alphabetized and cataloged VHS collection. It was like having Blockbuster right next door, but free (to us). I was about 11 years old and the neighbors were 1 and 3 years younger than me. We watched TONS of scary movies. TONS. Movies like “Halloween” (still freaks me out), and “Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark” (the original). I have to tell you, I HATE scary movies. In fact, I still freak myself out when it’s dark in the house. Admittedly, I don’t step anywhere on the floor close to my bed if it’s dark. I take an extra-large step so that nothing can grab my ankles from under the bed. Yes, I do this. Yes, I’m 42.  I don’t know why I watched all those movies and I don’t know where any of our parents were. I won’t even watch cop shows because I freak out so much. I probably need some sort of hypnosis to remove the still fresh images of some of those films.

As a kid, movies pretty much encompassed all that I thought I was afraid of. They were tangible, and spoke to that certain fear part of the brain. But, what I didn’t realize, is that I was afraid pretty much all of the time, of everything. I was afraid of failure, rejection, sickness, loss, security, and insignificance.  I muddled my way through those years holding on to a thin thread of hope, and always wondering when it would finally snap.  I didn’t even know what that thread was made of, or who held the other end of it. And I so wish that I did.

In my early 30’s, I caught a glimpse of the other end of that string. It was God. But I didn’t understand really who he was and why he’d been helping me my whole life. I just knew if I kept seeking him, somehow that thread would strengthen and become my lifeline. And several years later, with continued seeking, it has become just that.  What I didn’t know, was that Satan is the one who has been running with scissors, chasing me my whole life, with only one mission: to cut that line.

If you are a Christ follower, you might know that the stronger your relationship with Jesus, the more Satan wants to take you down.  I guess that’s why some of the stuff that happened to me before I knew Jesus was not that awful. And, of course, everyone’s awful is completely different. God wanted me so much that he protected me all these years, even when I didn’t acknowledge him. And, when I did, that pissed Satan off majorly.  He brought out those big guns. The ones he started using on me when I was growing up. He tied into all my biggest fears.  You know, failure, rejection, sickness, loss, security, and insignificance. The thing is, he’s actually super crafty, because you wouldn’t think your negative inner voice and low self-worth come from somewhere else. In fact, most people think these thoughts are totally valid, and that the world determines our worth. We believe these to be 100% true. And that’s the crafty part of it, because they are 100% false.

Truth comes only from God. And his truth lives in the Bible. No where that I’ve seen does the Bible talk about how we aren’t able to be a whole person if someone rejects us, or if we lose something or someone in our life. The Bible doesn’t tell us to muddle along life being careful and mediocre because we might fail. It doesn’t tell us we’d better wait until we are fully prepared to start following God’s calling for our life. And it certainly doesn’t say you’d better be sure to follow what everyone else is doing in order to be accepted and loved.

With God on our side, our fears are moot. He promises that he’s already prepared us for what we are supposed to do. He’s prepared us to be significant. Even if we don’t realize it. He won’t send us a detailed list of all the things he’s laid out. But he will be there as you to step out in Faith and do it anyway. Do it blindly. “Do it afraid.” (Joyce Meyer)

The only thing stopping us from stepping out of our comfort zone is our Fear. And Fear comes only from Satan. And God is more powerful than he is. And God is on your side; he’s on your team. He’s holding your hand as you jump of the cliff into the unknown. And he isn’t letting go. And Fear is left behind.

You wouldn’t know it, but I’m afraid to write. I’m afraid it won’t be good enough. I’m afraid it will be useless. I’m afraid of being useless. I’m afraid of crossing the street at an intersection. I’m afraid of calling people and ordering pizza. I’m afraid to ask dumb questions. I’m afraid to accept some truths about myself. I’m afraid of saying I’m sorry. I’m afraid of forgiveness. I’m afraid of giving my heart away. I’m afraid I’m not good enough for anyone or anything. I’m afraid to share my faith. I’m afraid I’m a failure as a wife and a mother. I’m afraid of saying the wrong thing.

I asked God this year to bring me challenges. To open doors that had super scary things on the other side. To help me face the boogie man under the bed. I told him I trusted him enough to bust through my fear and that He would protect me. And, wouldn’t you know it, he’s doing just what I asked. And, of course, this freaks me out. But, just like he said, he’s prepared me for this. In ways I never understood at the time. And I AM taking those steps (most of the time), and I found out that even in the scary, I feel calm. In fact, pushing past the fear (defeating it) makes me feel super good!

It’s time to stop being afraid of the dark. Of the lies. And start stepping out in Faith so that you can see the Truth that is waiting.

What are you afraid of? Do you feel called to do something that totally freaks you out? If so, it’s probably exactly what God wants you to do.